Tuesday, April 11, 2006

i realli feel like breakin down at this moment of time! I realli dun understand y my parents dun understand what i'm tinkin... is tat called generation gaP? i dun tink so... when i'm young, i believe that i have a wonderful family that i can sustain on, without any communication prob... however, as i grow older, i was wrong...

everyone seems to be busy wif their own life... my house is like a motel! simply slp, washed up and sign out! needless to say a home-cooked dinner with the whole family eating together. it has been more than 6 month no home-cooked dinner, i tink even longer than 6 month dun even hav the whole family meal... ... ...

my MUM... simply dun understand me!!! keep on pickin up the old stuff n tok again n again... cant we just discuss the issue once n FULL STOP!!! muz she repeat non-stop? i wondered wad kind of family m i in? they nv care, nv tok or even nv bother bout me! din even wan to know wad m i doin recently? is this call independent livin?

i'm nt introvert! i'm vocal... daring in speakin up my point of view, y cant the environment b suitable for my growth? sometime i realli feelin like crying when agruing the same issues again n again... CRYING cant solve anything. i would detest myself for if i cry, cry = failure, i will nv tolerate failure! adverse condition will then replicate a strong mind... DETERMINED

last nite i hav a fever of 40 degree cel, i asked my bro to send mi to clinic as i'm feelin weak, he simply told me, "Not free la, very hungry!", in the end i saw him cooking dinner for my sis-in-law!!! is a meal more impt then our brotherhood? Walking alone to the dental for my braces is terrible, my heavy head, muscle aching body and feverish body didnt pull me down, however, my determination of independent pull me tru! In the dental, i cant tolerate the hit anymore and went to the clinic for an injection...

Upon return home, my parents simply nv care wad's goin on... As usual chattin on phone, told them i'm havin a high fever, NO REACTION!!! i gave up... I hate this family! Today I still went to sch with my sick self, y? simply bcuz stayin at home is pointless, i rather enjoy the accompany of my frenz...

I cant wait to move out of my house! LEAVE THIS MOTEL... my life is so screwed~ but i will b a stronger soul... I BELIEVE I WILL... my family is as sick as me...

BattyCas 11:53 PM